The California Times— Refusile: Paradise Gone Green
By Oscar DeGrouse
Early Thursday, November 22nd, renowned oceanic
explorer Charles Hobbs was the first to claim the Great Pacific Garbage
Patch. Through his efforts Hobbs has
reaffirmed what many New Jersey residents have felt for years: one man’s trash is another man’s property. Hobbs named and founded his new country
Refusile. Standing proudly at the site
of his soon to be oceanfront estate, Hobbs told us, “No matter where you go in
this world, there is one absolute fundamental flaw with our society: we litter. People are afraid to admit it, to take responsibility,
but hell, I will,” Hobbs said, “because look around you. It’s perpetual real estate.” Hobbs believes his claim brings bold new
ideas to the concept of “going green.”
“In a sense, we aren’t just recycling plastic bottles, oil, chemicals
and cardboard boxes like you do in the blue bins in your kitchen, next to your houses
and at university, because in this situation, the ocean is doing it for you by
creating an entire island. It’s a very
exciting thing!”
Hobbs’s enthusiasm is shared by his first mate: the
Australian turned naturalized American, Nate Chapman. “You see,” Chapman exclaimed in his thick Aussie
accent, “this place we have is a lot like Hawaii. It’s in the Pacific, we get great weather,
and like the magma that keeps flowing out the ground on their island to make her
bigger, the trash keeps flowing to ours to make it bigger.” Chapman chucked an empty fifth
overboard. “I mean blimey. It’s the only place in the entire world where
littering actually improves your land value.”
Nate believes that it is a human being’s egotism that leads him or her
to litter: “It’s a natural thing, you know.
Toss it. Who cares where? If somebody else don’t get it, nature
will. Problem solved.”
And according to Hobbs the problem has been solved. Negotiations have begun for the purchasing of
land on Refusile as happy immigrants flock to the island paradise. And as city and island planning begins, Hobbs
currently estimates land value at about 8,000 USD per acre. “I expect those that buy early will get a
better price. As supply and demand
dictates the late comers will have to pay a bit more. What can I say? The land is hot right now.” And it shows little sign of stopping. Of course oceanfront locations on Refusile naturally
are a bit pricier, but Hobbs believes people will pay it. “Your best bet is oceanfront. The only part of the island that’s growing is
the shorefront.” Hobbs admits, however, that
getting some areas on the island to perk “has raised a few minor issues.”
Refusile, by low end estimates (270,000 sq miles) is roughly
the size of Texas and nearly 27 times larger than Hawaii, making it the fourth
largest Island in the world only to the 3rd, 2nd and 1st
largest of Borneo, New Guinea and
Greenland respectively. “And it is only
getting bigger!” Hobbs said with an entrepreneurial grin.
We took the opportunity to interview one of the new residents
while he was walking his canine companion, James Frederick Remington. “I am
just enamored with the idea that we can do something with it. I have always wanted to live by the ocean,”
Terrance Hines, stated. “My friends back home were so jealous when I told them
I was moving to an island paradise.”
Terrance cleaned up after his dog and happily tossed the baggie
aside. “It’s just perfect here.”
Sadly, not everything on Refusile is paradise. “Currently our biggest problem is logistics,”
Hobbs stated. “We are an island, and we
are in the middle of the Pacific. It
takes time to ship building supplies.”
But Hobbs is optimistic in Refusile’s success.
In the middle of the Pacific is right. Refusile, at 145° W and 37°N, is located in
the Convergence Zone of the North Pacific Gyre: an area of the Pacific that is
the largest contiguous ecosystems on the planet. Hobbs anticipates the angling company
Shureline will be looking to buy in as well.
“It’s a great place to catch some serious fish. You might even find that when you get there,
the fishing has already been done for you.”
Whatever the outcome of Hobbs’s endeavor he’s excited. “You can pretty much guaranty that this
island will be here for our children to grow up on and their children to grow
up. In other words, Refusile isn’t going
anywhere.”
A California Times
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